But, let me guess, you're his favorite.
Dear Texas business owners: why do you want to talk to me about Jesus?
While I applaud your efforts to remind the flighty denizens of Austin that they are encased in a super-sized dungeon of drawling evangelicalism, I’m just not sure I want to have this conversation with my pizza parlor (to be frank, I’m not sure I want to have any conversation with a restaurant that offers “Pig Wings,” whatever the hell those are).
In any case, you should know that you’ve gotten your quote wrong. It actually goes, “For God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”
Which is a perfectly nice line, from a literary standpoint, but not as nice as this one:
Yet she became more and more promiscuous as she recalled the days of her youth, when she was a prostitute in Egypt. There she lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys and whose emission was like that of horses.
Ezekiel 23:19-20, ladies and gents.
